Pink Chaddi Campaign : A Consortium of Pub-going,

Well, at least one thing did originate from apna Punjab... Happy Valentine's Day! In spite of what you have been told by everyone, the truth is that Valentine's Day originated many tens of years ago- in India, and to top it all, in Punjab. It is a well known fact that Punjabi men, continually mistreat and disrespect their wives (Punjabans. One fine day - it just happened to be the 14th day of February- could have been any other day - one brave Punjaban, having had enough "torture" by her husband, finally chose to rebel by beating him up with a Velan (rolling pin). Yes....the same Velan which she used daily, to make chapattis for him....Only this time, instead of the dough, it was the husband who was flattened. This was a momentous occasion for all Punjaban women and a revolt soon spread, like wild fire, with thousands of housewives beating up their husbands with the Velan. There was an spontaneous outburst of moaning "chapatti-ed" husbands all over Jalandhar and Ludhiana . The Punjabi men-folk quickly learnt their lesson and started to behave more respectfully with their Punjabans. Thereafter, on every 14th February, every year, the womenfolk of Punjab would beat up their husbands, to commemorate that eventful day.The wives having the satisfaction of beating up their husbands with the Velan and the men having the supreme joy of submitting to the will of the women they loved. This glorious tradition of bashing continued...till one smart Sardar discovered bribery. And Punjabi men realised that in order to avoid this ordealon 14th Feb, they needed to present gifts to their wives....they brought flowers and sweetmeats. Hence the tradition began. Now some of you may ask, why do men kneel? That's a british tradition. No its not. One Punjaban did not like the flowers the sardar brought(a cauli-flower). So she clubbed him down with a Velan. That started another part of the tradition - the men started kneeling when offering flowers. Punjabis were heavily influenced by Western culture. So on one 14th Feb, one ignorant guy asked another, "Ki time hai?" the other guy said, "Oye, b------d, aj 'Velan time'. Sidha hoja". So began "Velan Time".... Punjabis going abroad to UK and USA soon spread this culture in those countries... specifically, the catch words 'Velan time!'. Unfortunately, the bloody English and their foreign tongues anglicised 'Velantime' to 'Valentine'. And thereafter, 14th of February, came to be known as Valentine's Day! Poor Muthalik - the guardian of Indian culture, the recipient of so many pink chaddis - he thinks its a foreign tradition. Will some hefty Punjaban give him the traditional "Velan" treatment???